corellian_sugar: (Fuel: Innocent)

Getting ready to do a calibration on a baker at the Clackamas cafe. I'd rather take a nap.
corellian_sugar: (Fuel: Innocent)
I am so not feeling the funny right now, guys. I am utterly exhausted. Last night, all the muscles in my chest were so tight that it hurt to breathe. My legs are killing me. And I'm pretty sure I've got the beginning symptoms of a bladder infection or UTI (yes, pushing the Azo Standard and cranberry juice). If you'd all been flies on the wall, you would have been witness to a rather terse conversation with my boss - he called to ask me if I could sit in on job interviews tomorrow. Long story short: NO EFFING WAY.

So I'm going back into my files again for Something Funny, because absolutely nothing is funny today.

Tasha and Stitch 2

In December 2008, I went to Disneyland with my mother, Tasha -- and [ profile] darthdoggie, her mom, and sister. One morning, we decided to have a family breakfast: just me, mom, and Tasha. We chose the PCH Grill at the Paradise Pier Hotel, home of the Lilo & Stitch Breakfast. When Stitch came to our table, he semi-behaved in photos for me and my mother. Tasha was not so lucky. I think he hugged on her head for over five minutes. By the time he stopped, we were all in hysterics. That was a happy memory. I actually remember mom saying after he left, "I've been smiling so long my face hurts!"

Always a good thing. 
corellian_sugar: (Fuel: Innocent)
Here, have a picture of 17 year-old me.

This was a photography class self-portrait assignment. I always liked how this one turned out with the warm yellow light.

Sheesh. I was so young. What the hell happened?
corellian_sugar: (Fuel: Innocent)

This was taken sitting on the sidewalk looking toward the front door of the house. Love the shadows on this one...
corellian_sugar: (Fuel: Innocent)

The still-elusive Cosette. I think she might be a ninja. Because there are days where I never see her, no lie.
corellian_sugar: (White daisy)

The mid-afternoon sun flaring through the dining room window screen.

At least I'm somewhat caught up now. This work week is absolutely wiping me out... and I'm only facing my Wednesday tonight. Ugh.
corellian_sugar: (Fuel: Innocent)

Hello, I am a dough transport. When I'm full of bread dough, I weigh well over 150 pounds. My heavy metal door latches shut to keep the dough nice, moist, and protected until it's time for baking. 
corellian_sugar: (Fuel: Innocent)
The first thing that comes to mind with this prompt is: KITCHEN ENVIRONMENT.

These are our daily and weekly cleaning duties. Because a clean kitchen environment is a happy kitchen environment.
corellian_sugar: (Film and popcorn)

I finally got my ass to Star Trek Into Darkness this afternoon. It was freaking awesome, and that wasn't the hard cider and gourmet food at the Cinetopia talkin'. I genuinely enjoy this revamped franchise (wasn't really an original Trek fan at all), which sort of surprises me, to be honest.

This was snapped at the end of the credits. After Dark(ness). Yes, You saw what I did there. I HAVE NO SHAME.

Oh, and remind me never to piss Benedict Cumberbatch off. HOLY SHIT.
corellian_sugar: (Tea in flowered cup)
Well, this is my dresser, not a table. Whatever, they're both flat surfaces that hold stuff, right?

My lost babies sleeping under the accent lamp: Max and Kate. Also, my signed original Real Musgrave painting ("Scribbles") plus the figurine that this piece of art eventually inspired... both are signed. Tucked in front of the picture easel is an envelope with at least $200 in Cinetopia money in it. Anyone want to go the movies with me?
corellian_sugar: (LOLcat: happy kitty)
I was roused by a small gray thundercloud with a zombie arm hanging out of his mouth. Here, mom. I brought you something. I got up and went into my living room to find this:

The battlefield of toys. Thor has managed to kill a kangaroo, a fish, several mice, a duck, a xenomorph, pull the arm off a zombie (which he carried from the bedroom and deposited beyond the alien), and move his ball track toy from the fireplace half way across the room. Not seen: three picture frames, my bluetooth, and my small pencil cases of crochet hooks (closed, thank god) that also hit the floor. Clearly, this is why I can't have nice things, LOL. My cat, the zombie killer. I think I'll keep him.

ETA: As I found Cosette asleep on the bed with me when I woke up and she followed me out to the living room, I think she had little to do with this. She has shown little if any interest in toys, really... and sometimes has an expression on her face that reads, "Thor, you idiot."  You gotta love it.
corellian_sugar: (Fuel: Innocent)
B is for...


Gentle readers, this is Toby. He is 74 years old, so he's a senior citizen teddy. Over the years, he's had the fur and plush literally loved right off him. He was given to my mother for Christmas in 1938 (when she was two). He was passed down to me when I was about ten. He now has a place of honor in my maternal grandfather's leather chair in the corner of my bedroom, along with an equally well-loved Rags (a stuffed dog given to me by the same grandfather when I was nine months old -- he passed away before I turned one, so I never truly knew him). Toby's had a long life and a lot of adventures. He deserves a posh retirement.
corellian_sugar: (Default)
Okay, here goes nothing. I'll cross them off as I tackle them (and probably cross-post to Twitter when I've knocked one off the list). I really think this is going to be good for me, and I need something like this right now. Anyone else feel like getting on board? :)


1. Make a cup of tea and just breathe

2. Send a nice anonymous message to a friend

3. Draw a picture for a friend

4. Start a new hobby

5. Bake something

6. Light an aromatherapy candle or incense when you're exceptionally stressed. Still your mind, breathe.

7. Take a nap

8. Think about what makes you smile when you're feeling stressed or worried

9. Look at yourself in the mirror and compliment yourself

10. Drink coffee -- alone or with a friend

11. Write a haiku

12. Realize everything will be okay

13. Tell someone they look nice today

14. Tell someone you how proud you are of them

15. Put a picture of a smiley face on someone's computer screen or work desk

16. Pay for someone behind you at a drive-thru

17. Make it a point to bring a gift to a doctor, nurse, or someone else in the medical profession.

18. Send a random e-card to a friend for absolutely no reason at all only that you're thinking of them

19. Put on your pjs, pop popcorn, turn out the lights, and watch one of your favorite movies.

20. Find the beauty and grace in the holiday season

21. Take a needy child's request off an Angel Giving Tree and fulfill their fondest holiday wish this year

22. Do something nice for someone who has been supportive and helpful to you

23. On a cold day, buy a hot chocolate or coffee to a Salvation Army bell ringer

24. Bring in treats for co-workers to share

25. Snuggle in bed for 15 minutes every day and read


Nov. 10th, 2012 09:56 am
corellian_sugar: (Default)
I'm just going to unlock this entry and cross-post it to Twitter. I've gotten a few texts, DMs, and queries over the past week about Max, but I've been far too wiped out to answer any of them.

It's been a stressful week. Wednesday morning, I posted to Facebook during a break at work that Max had gained a pound and I was pretty thrilled. I think I might have jinxed myself. I got home to find that Max had gotten sick everywhere downstairs. Vomiting. Diarrhea. Urine. He was laying listless on the floor. When he did walk, his gait was staggered and low to the ground. He would not eat or drink. I scooped him up and took him to the vet immediately.

His weight was still stable, but he was terribly dehydrated. He got some subcutaneous fluids and a vitamin shot. I was told to continue the meds and the vet would call on Thursday to decide if an ultrasound was necessary. Thursday morning, I returned home from work and he was no better. Still not eating. Still listless. I called the vet as soon as they opened, and they told me an ultrasound could be done that day if I got him in immediately for pre-prep.

The emotional roller coaster started when I dropped Max off for the ultrasound. I was told that his pancreas was more than likely the culprit, and they wanted permission to do a biopsy immediately if they found anything suspect. I told them yes, went home, and tried to get some sleep (ha).

I finally fell asleep at around noon, and the vet called at 3 p.m. to report there were suspicious areas on his pancreas and his liver. While there was no way to tell until the lab results came back, I was told we were dealing with three possible scenarios: 1) acute, severe pancreatitis 2) pancreatic abscess, or 3) pancreatic cancer. Max was actually so weak, so bad that I was a mess. I did not want to see him suffer. It was absolutely tearing me apart. If it was pancreatitis, it was likely chronic. They could treat it into a remission state. If the pancreas eventually punked out from excessive aggravation, insulin would possibly be in Max's future. If it was a pancreatic abscess, we were looking at surgery and an aggressive antibiotic treatment. And if it was cancer... well, pancreatic cancer in cats is terminal.

The results came back on Friday afternoon. No cancer. No abscess. However, the vet suspected Max was suffering from three-organ inflammation, or triaditis. Certainly not terminal, but he's still a very sick kitty. The vet, bless him, calls me daily to get updates. Max is on a special medical diet, three medications and a weekly B12 shot -- and I strongly suspect that after Dr. Wilson's call this afternoon (forthcoming), we'll be adding a stronger antibiotic and something for pain management to the roster.

At any rate, my grumpy old man is still with me (on Thursday, he was so bad that I was pretty sure I was going to lose him -- and I spent most of the day absolutely inconsolable). All I can do is hope the medications do their thing soon and try to keep him as comfortable as possible. His doctor insists that once the pancreas and liver calm down, Max will be back to his old self -- but the inflammation is terrible right now.

So between Max, taking care of mom in her eighth week of shingles (and still in as much pain as week one), and trying to work through all this -- I've been pretty wiped out. I think I've only had about seven hours of sleep in the past three days. If I'm not roused by phone calls from Max's vet, I'm roused by Max's medication schedule (or Max clumsily stumbling around), or trying to make sure mom's eating and helping her with pain control. The fact that I've been dealing with large bakes, lots of test bakes of the new products launching in about a week or so, AND two pre-celebration meetings (one down, one to go on Sunday)... well, it hasn't helped with the exhaustion factor a bit. I'm glad tomorrow is my Friday (even though I still have that pesky last meeting on my first evening off).

Baby steps, right? And breathing. I can do this, but OMG SO TIRED. SO SO TIRED.
corellian_sugar: (Default)
Needless to say, the Christmas spirit has been woefully absent in the family for the last four years. Shortly before Christmas 2001, we lost my aunt to lung cancer and an aneurysm. Shortly after Christmas 2002, we lost my grandmother. My father's deteriorating health (due to Alzheimer's Disease) and the loss of four additional family members in 2003 made Christmas more of an ordeal than a celebration... and finally, Christmas 2004 - by far the most difficult Christmas due to the fact that my father was no longer home for the holiday, having been placed in an Alzheimer's care facility in September of 2004.

I had a long discussion with my mother a couple of months ago, and we both lamented the loss of the holiday spirit with the difficulties that our family has faced in the past few years. The holidays used to filled with relatives and laughter. Now so many relatives are gone and the remaining relatives have sort of splintered and drifted away from us, dealing with their own issues and pain. We have shrunk from a holiday family gathering of 20 to a holiday family gathering of five: me, my mother, my brother, my niece, and Max (yes, I'm counting the cat because he's as much family as anyone else is).

We need to make the effort for family bonding during the holiday season this year, even though it's going to be hard. Those family members are still gone, and it will be the second Christmas without my father.

Today is the first day in holiday family bonding. We have designated it as "Christmas Tree and House Decorating Day". Scott and Tasha will be over shortly. There is a jumble of Christmas boxes in the middle of the living room. There is a new pre-lit Christmas tree in a box waiting to be liberated (but currently Max thinks said box is his new couch). The whole house smells like beef stew, cornbread, and apple cider.

And I can feel the threads of pre-Christmas excitement starting to stir in my chest. It feels good. I don't care that it's not even Thanksgiving yet and we're putting up a tree. Maybe this will help us feel better about Thanksgiving, too (another holiday that's rough for us).

I haven't felt any sort of excitement or anticipation about the Christmas season in four years. It's nice to know that those feelings are still there. There were probably always there, just long dormant due to stress, grieving, and exhaustion.

No stress this year. No grieving. No exhaustion. Just me and my family, celebrating what we have and not dwelling on what we don't have.

I can live with that.
corellian_sugar: (Sith Kitten (by living_force))
:::picks up phone receiver and peers at it intently:::

Maybe I should just have this thing surgically attached to my head.

Oh, and I just made a woman cry because I took an application on a house that she wanted. That's too bad. She should have made an application appointment. First come, first serve. Now she's calling me every ten minutes to beg and cry some more.

corellian_sugar: (Anakin scar (by rohandove))
Happy Birthday to the lovely and uber-cool, [ profile] prime_meridian! Love ya, chica! :::tosses rose petals and hands you a big white chocolate mocha:::



Apr. 1st, 2005 07:49 am
corellian_sugar: (Innocent)
Staying home today. Spent all last night feeling like I was attempting to eject my lungs from my chest. Rib cage, chest muscles, and lungs so, so sore. Throat still on fire. Can't eat. Fever of 102.2. Cough headache hangover.

Cripes. Am going to attempt tea for the second time this morning and then crawl back to bed.

In other news, my kitty is eight years old today. In honor of Max, I will entertain him with my impression of coughing up hairballs. I'm getting pretty good at it.


Mar. 31st, 2005 07:38 am
corellian_sugar: (Default)
Let's get in a little time machine and go back to April 2002. Whilst helping my mother prep and paint the upstairs of the house, I start dealing with a killer sore throat and fever. Within two weeks, I still have that killer sore throat, and the infection has moved into my ears and lungs. Hello, bronchitis. Hello, fluid on the lungs. Hello, perforated eardrums. I didn't start feeling better until... oh, July.

Back to current day... it's late March 2005. I have a killer sore throat and a fever. I can feel the infection moving into my ears, and every once in a while it feels like someone is squeezing my lungs so hard that I can't breathe (and only manage this strangled wheeze).

I am so tired and frustrated that I could cry. I refuse to go through another SW opening so sick that I have no choice but to be seriously medicated on codiene based painkillers and cough suppressants (like I did for AOTC), but right now I can't help but wonder if history is repeating itself.

Going to call the doctor and get an appointment as soon as I get into the office and hope he can fit me in today. Please, please, please, please...

Note: [ profile] corellian_sugar adores Vader, but she doesn't necessarily want to SOUND like him. Thank you.
corellian_sugar: (Default)
I just want to thank everyone for their kind words and support after my last post. I just felt so emotionally raw yesterday that I was actually teetering on the razor's edge of going home from work. I just couldn't seem to shake it off. I have this tendency to fall easily into "want to fix the universe mode", which doesn't help. Ah, to be omnipotent... but having good friends like you guys really helps more than you can possibly imagine.

I'm better today. Tired, but better. TGIF, man. Let's hope the day goes fast.
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